For some of us, Valentine’s Day can be a source of anxiety. We can become obsessed with whether the cutest boy in the class will take us out or give us a card. Or we may wonder whether or not we will receive chocolates from someone. All of this can negatively devastate our self-esteem and make us feel very bad. The good news is that we can control our anxiety. We can control how we will behave on Valentine’s Day. We can control whether or not we will have a good time on Valentine’s Day. And we can control what we do and who we go out with on Valentine’s Day. So there are many things that ARE under our control. Here are four tips to curb your anxiety and regardless of whether you enjoy Valentine’s Day, what happens is beyond our control.

1. Don’t worry if that cute boy will get you out or not. That is not something you can control. So relax and make your own plans to enjoy the day. Plan an outing for yourself at your favorite café or take yourself out for a manicure or pedicure.

2. Don’t believe so much in being happy for one day that it makes you miserable for a week before and after. We have all been there. Everyone wants everything to be perfect. But, most of the time, things just aren’t perfect. So, you must decide to be happy because it is a day of love and compassion.

3. Enjoy the true essence of the day. The day is to love and express love. So why not do that anyway? Be nice to everyone you meet. Convey good cheer by doing a good deed for several people and smile. People will want to hang out, and who knows, you might even get a date with that cute boy.

4. Don’t compare yourself to others. There’s no better way to have a bad day than when you want to be as popular or beautiful as one of your friends, but you can’t live up to her image. You are only who you are. Celebrate that and don’t worry about being like everyone else. Not only is it a waste of time, but it also predisposes you to being self-critical, which can damage your self-esteem and how you feel in general.

So this Valentine’s Day, do something different. Decide that you will have fun regardless. Don’t feel sad or anxious. It’s just one day and you can enjoy it. So, make this Valentine’s Day the best of your life. Who knows, maybe your attitude and behavior are contagious and you will also show others how to have fun.